I am meeting Dr. Posnick for the fifth time, the last time before surgery. We do the usual “mouthful of goo to make impressions and to see how the gag reflex is doing” routine. Also, he fits me with the splint that will sit between my upper and lower teeth. Jeff reviews the surgery items: break, widen and move forward the upper jaw; break and move forward the lower jaw; section and move forward the chin to create a pleasing profile; clean out the nasal turbinates (whatever THEY are); liposuction under the chin to insure that Dr. Posnick’s masterworks are never obscured by the possibility that I may acquire a dowager’s double chin as I enter my dotage. All of this will be held together by 44 titanium screws, and I will have three outside locations with sutures. Otherwise, all the stitches will be inside my mouth.
We discuss the recession around my bottom front teeth. The orthodontic devices, it turns out, have the propensity in adults to pull gum tissue away from the teeth. In younger patients this is not a problem. Adults, it turns out, experience accelerated gum recession, and this is acutely present the longer braces are on the teeth. When I voice my dismay at not having heard that before, I am quietly scolded with with admonition, “I am certain that somewhere along the way one of your dental professionals told you this. ZOWEE! Let me assure you that I would remember if ANY one of my seven dentists told me that. I was reminded of those drug ads on television where the first 25 seconds are spent describing the benefits of the latest wonder drug to cure your toe fungus, and the last five seconds are CRAMMED full of the side affects which include dry mouth, hair loss, diminished libido, weight gain, oh, and possibly death. DEATH?????
Undeterred at my visible chagrin, Jeff continues discussion of my gum recession. At first, the conversation goes something like “This recession is about as bad as it gets.” Not five minutes go by before Jeff says, “You may lose that tooth.” By the end of the visit, he is announcing that I will “probably” lose the affected tooth. Yep, that’s quite a side effect of having orthodonture – you may lose the teeth you are seeking to straighten.